deadly_ned | 008

So.

As a first time Warden more or less mentoring a first time Inmate, there's this very important question that's been hovering menacingly near my head for the last few days like a demonic little helicopter and I would be remiss if I didn't at least ask it, even if I'm sure it's obvious to the more seasoned Wardens, Inmates, what have you.

...Is an Inmate's happiness more important than their graduation?

If you had to choose one, I mean.

And I think I should also ask to Inmates because I don't...like the unspoken divide and communication is usually an effective bridge over most divides..

What do you need from your warden to be happier?

[Private to Claire Bennet, Jesse Pinkman, the Marquis de Sade, and Megamind as a group]

Someone happened to tell me you're a dog person.

I'm trying to..rehome my dog, Digby. My Inmate is scared of them and it's probably best if Digby and I separated until my Inmate graduates. And I'd like to find someone to...borrow him, or take him, but if I don't find someone he'll have to go home and we've never been separated and I'm feeling a little...clingy.

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sir_drinksalot

Women and alcohol.

[He's pretty simple.]

And seeing my friends.

deadly_ned

That's really all you need? Nothing else? Just those three things?

.... what else is there?

Love?

Family?

...Pets?

I've been in love a few times.

[Obviously nothing serious.]

Don't have any family, unless you count my troll of a sister.

I have a horse! That's like a pet.

Does your horse make you happy?

I like to ride.

[Aside from that, it's just his horse.]

There's something oddly endearing about someone who only needs women and alcohol to be happy.

[That makes Gwaine laugh.]

Thanks. At least you didn't say shallow.

I couldn't in all honesty call you shallow. You're here.

I'm afraid I haven't helped much, though.

What would you like to help with?

I don't know. I mean, I wasn't able to offer any solution to your problem.

Is there something I can do to help?

My inmate and I both cook.

Well.

He cooks and I bake.

Do you cook?

No, but I like to eat.

Ah! There's something else that makes me happy.

Food.

I knew that was going to be there.

How about...my inmate cooks for you and we'll try...different recipes each week.

And you...tell us what you like and don't like.

So, I can help you by eating your food?

Are you sure that's how it works? Not that I'm complaining!

I'll ask Thomas, but it might help. One of the, um.

One of the ways I gained confidence my first few years as a baker was having people try my pie and tell me how they felt about it.

If it'll help, I'll be more than happy to do it.

We're going to make you so fat.

It's a good thing I get a lot of exercise.

You'll be round. We'll have to roll you around the barge and whenever there's a crash you could accidentally pitch yourself over the side.

[That makes Gwaine laugh quite a bit.]

Arthur isn't going to like that, but I can't think of a better way to go.

Arthur...Pendragon? King Arthur?

Yes. So you know him?

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008 - Pecan

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