015 - Banana Creme

[deadly_ned]

Alpha, Digby and I are on walkabout. If you need to reach us, please leave a message at the tone.


[Private to Alpha

I have to get off this ship.

We. We have to get off this ship. Pick whoever you want to be, I'll dress to match, and we're going to...go into this port and have a good time and I don't..know what else. Whatever you want to do.

[Private to Dean]

Um. Problem.

[Private to Arthas]

Hi.

Uh.

I know we don't...talk much.

I just.

Wanted to see how things were going.

How are things...going?


[Spam]

[The Piemaker has never been to L.A., never stepped foot in California before. But while the discomfort of another yet-unfamiliar place was, as usual, all-encompassing, at least this unfamiliar place was stationed on Earth. The Piemaker could pretend for a little while to be normal.

He's taking that opportunity now, dressing up in the manner of a Hollywood B-Lister with shades and expensive clothes to match. Now fully in his role, he steps off the Barge to begin his new, pretend life for four days]

Comments

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

...Huh. [Dean clearly did not know this. Make of that what you will.]

Okay, well anyway, what's up?

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

Do you know a man by the name of Richard B. Riddick?


Do you know Arthas?

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

Yes.

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

Arthas has his heart back. He's alive.

Riddick...he made me touch it. He told people, and he brought a dead heart to my doorstep and then he ran away with it before I could touch it again.

And then he made me watch my gift kill him.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

Wait, what?

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

Which part are you saying that to?

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

Pick a part, any part.

No, wait, okay. First thing's first: what's that mean for you? I mean, there are rules, one person dies and one person doesn't or whatever, but what's that mean for you that you accidentally... made a zombie into a real boy again. Anything?

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

Aside from personal trauma? Nothing physical. I don't. It doesn't take anything out of me to do it.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

[a w k w a r d]

Okay. Good. I'd hate to have to try to throwdown with Riddick, that dude packs a punch.

Does Arthas know it was you?

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

He does because I told him. I didn't want him brushing up against me on accident and I wanted to tell him what he was in for concerning the future.


He's not going to tell anyone.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

I'm not worried about him telling anyone. I'm worried that he's batshit insane and violent to boot. I'd hate to have to try to throwdown with him, too, although I'm probably better equipped than most at this point.

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

He isn't like that. Wasn't.


And if he turns out to be, all I need to do is walk over and touch him.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

He is like that. I've seen it.

So it was just his heart? He's still a zombie? Or is that some kinda loophole, only getting one touch from the energizer piemaker?

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

He wasn't like that with me.

He's not a zombie. He's alive.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

That's because you have a pretty good corner on the puppy face market. Believe me, I know.

Are we gonna argue about this again? Or are you being serious right now?

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

Why does everyone say that to me? What's this puppy face?

I'm being serious. Right now.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

I'll take a picture of it the next time it happens.

...I'm not even sure what to do with that. I've never heard of that before.

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

Thank you.

I can bring back zombies now. I didn't know I could do that.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

That's not exactly something I'd get into the habit of, if I were you. I don't care how great a guy Jesus was.

How'd Riddick find out?

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

I wouldn't think to compare us. Jesus can do the magic finger touch without terrible things happening. And I don't like to think of what crucifixion would do to my pie-baking hands.


I told him. It was stupid to tell him. I just...thought things would be different, now that I was older. But people don't change just because you get older.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

I meant that Jesus was a zombie. But you're right, that's a much more obvious connection.

[Dean sighs.]

Ned. Yeah, it was stupid to tell 'im, but I know why you did, and that's not... wrong. [It is, in fact, one of Dean's favorite things about Ned. Not that he'd ever say that without being forced into it.]

How long had he known?

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

Lazarus. I know. I'm...aware. I looked for people who shared my gift but I didn't ever want to put myself in the same ballpark. The same...state. As Jesus.

It wasn't smart. Which in a case of life or death, might as well be the same as wrong.

He....a month? Maybe more. Probably longer than a month, it's all sort of...hazy. This was the first time anything ever came of it.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

No. Smart doesn't always mean right. Dumb isn't always wrong. That's not how it works. You didn't do what you did with me because it was smart, but it wasn't wrong, either.

So he didn't like, find out and just react. He had time to think about it.

[ Private ]

[deadly_ned]

I just...needed to tell someone. I'd rather it be someone I trusted. A friend.

No, he. He knew about it for a while.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

I get that. I've almost gotten used to people around here knowing what I do. No one thinks I'm insane - at least, not because of that. But back home it's just me and other hunters, or people that have seen some of the things I've seen first hand, and even then they usually just want to forget about it, or don't care what else is out there.

I don't... I'm sorry, squeaky.