004 - Mincemeat

[deadly_ned]

Hello, Barge. My name is Ned, and I have a completely arbitrary and unrelated question to ask.

If you had a minute - 60 seconds - with any person currently dead and could talk and interact with them as normal, alive people would...

What would you say or ask them?

I suppose this question goes to the people who are currently...dead....and have alive people back home they're separated from as well.

It's an odd question, I know. But I've been...curious, lately.



Also, would the elf who took my wallet please give it back now? I hope you remember me; I was the piemaker dressed as a Franciscan monk. I hate to treat the network as my own personal Lost Connections newsletter but I really didn't know what other way to get in touch with you.

And if you're not actually an elf, I'm sorry for calling you one.

Comments

[deadly_ned]

I'm sorry.

You just look very different from when we first met and I. I don't know. I was looking for someone a little more...

Blonde?

[forsaken_queen]

I believe the word you were searching for is "alive".

[deadly_ned]

No, that wasn't the word I was searching for. You're alive. You're walking and talking. That's alive to me.

[forsaken_queen]

[She raises a brow at him.] Your definition needs work.

[deadly_ned]

My definition works just fine. Just because you might be cold or stiff doesn't necessarily equate to dead. If I walked over and stabbed you, would you die?

Of course you would. You can't be dead and die again. That's redundancy.

Re...deadancy.

[forsaken_queen]

You are not amusing, little man.

[deadly_ned]

I wasn't trying to be.

All I'm trying to do is to get my wallet back.

[forsaken_queen]

If you aren't trying to be funny, then you are either dense or purposefully attempting to be insulting.

[deadly_ned]

I'm not any of those things. Really! I'm not...trying to insult you.

I just think that when you're lying there on the ground and you don't move and the maggots move in and you become all dewy, that's dead. When you're walking and talking, that's alive.

Everything else is...gray area.

[forsaken_queen]

[Oh that didn't help at all. She looks very very annoyed. Possibly even angry. Those red eyes have narrowed and she is just...glaring.]

For your sake, little man, I recommend keeping your mouth shut about things you do not understand in the slightest.

[deadly_ned]

It's Ned, actually.

And I understand everything about death.