004 - Mincemeat

[deadly_ned]

Hello, Barge. My name is Ned, and I have a completely arbitrary and unrelated question to ask.

If you had a minute - 60 seconds - with any person currently dead and could talk and interact with them as normal, alive people would...

What would you say or ask them?

I suppose this question goes to the people who are currently...dead....and have alive people back home they're separated from as well.

It's an odd question, I know. But I've been...curious, lately.



Also, would the elf who took my wallet please give it back now? I hope you remember me; I was the piemaker dressed as a Franciscan monk. I hate to treat the network as my own personal Lost Connections newsletter but I really didn't know what other way to get in touch with you.

And if you're not actually an elf, I'm sorry for calling you one.

Comments

[deadly_ned]

You have a plan to right a wrong?

Who was she?

[fuckingvisions]

A graduated inmate here becomes a warden, you graduate an inmate you'll get the same wish deal you wardens get. Mine's going to be for her, to fix what was wronged or have her become one of the higher powers of our world. God knows those stuffy jerks could likely use someone brutally honest, and thats what she was.

Cordelia Chase was her name. SHe was aimin' to be an actress and ended up workin' with meself and a friend. Since I figure you're gonna ask, a long story short I'm cursed, I pissed off the hire powers and they cursed me. I liked the girl a lot I confess. The last moment I saw her I kissed her and well I found out here my curse passed to her and she's had to suffer that pain which eventully killed her from my understanding.

[deadly_ned]

It's amazing. The, um. The harm a kiss can do.

[fuckingvisions]

Sounds like somethin' outta a bad movie if you ask me. Least till it happens to one's self.

[deadly_ned]

And then there's no mistaking it.

Are you in a bad movie?

[fuckingvisions]

Exactly man,you sound like someone that's experienced this too.

Nah, no Hollywood blockbuster more straight to video then anythin' if you be askin' me.

[deadly_ned]

In a manner of speaking.


The difference being...a low production value and not enough distribution promotion?

[fuckingvisions]

Then you have my sympathies.

The former not the latter. And I more just overall bad story telling. The writters should've been fired.

[deadly_ned]

Thank...you?

I think you might just need to find a better narrator.

[fuckingvisions]

I tried for Patrick Stewart but wouldn't you know he'd be all booked up.

[deadly_ned]

I mean that situations can look better than they are given the right amount of narratorial spin.

[fuckingvisions]

That is a fine point, but you gotta admit Patrick Stewart can make anything sound good.

[deadly_ned]

Patrick Stewart has a natural British baritone advantage that the rest of us have to learn to live without.