009 - Key Lime

[deadly_ned]

I am only just now realizing that a dark and terrible storm is lurking over the horizon and that I may or may not have the resources necessary to prepare myself to face it.


And since I have one, and only one skill to offer in exchange..


Pies for any sort of sword-fighting or survivalist training for me and my inmate.


Please.


We're not fighters. At least, I'm not a fighter...much. I don't like to put words in the mouths of other people. I like to put pie there instead.

Or...room-cleaning, or I know Morse Code but I'm not sure how handy that will come in, but it's sort of a nifty little party trick when you're bored and have nothing better to do, but that might take a substantially larger amount of time than a simple comfort food hand-off.

[Locked to Thomas]

Digby has been re-homed. My room is officially dog-free. So you can...come, and go as you please.

If it pleases.

Also I may or may not have volunteered us both to go to a card game. Do you play cards? I can do a, um. A crash course.

Comments

[forsaken_queen]

When I strike for your heart, little man, it will be with something far more substantial than fear.

[deadly_ned]

I'm 6'3''.

[forsaken_queen]

You think height makes a difference. You are still small, insignificant and disposable.

[deadly_ned]

If you meant to say 'little' in the derogatory and not the literal sense you should have specified earlier. More people would understand what you mean when you speak clearly.

[forsaken_queen]

[You aren't doing yourself any favors here Ned.]

The lack of understanding is on your shoulders, neore. As I said before, it is painfully obvious you are incapable of understanding the simplest concepts.

[deadly_ned]

Why do you talk to me if you get so frustrated over what I do and don't understand?

[forsaken_queen]

I spoke to the death knight. You engaged me.

[deadly_ned]

Because you're in my post. You can't show up to a party and not talk to the host. That's just rude.

[forsaken_queen]

[Mockingly.] On who's part, yours or mine? Do be clear in your meanings, Piemaker.

[deadly_ned]

On yours. As soon as I saw you I came running over with a conversational tray of hors d'oeuvres for you to snack on.

[forsaken_queen]

And the fair you provided is like sawdust on the palette. [Why are we going with the cooking metaphor? Well...it works, so whatever.]

[deadly_ned]

If that's really the case, then let me make it up to you.

[forsaken_queen]

Oh this should good. Pray tell, do go on. [She dares you.]

[deadly_ned]

Tell me something about where you come from. What's your home like?

[forsaken_queen]

Why do you care?

[deadly_ned]

Giving people back a part of their home is something I care very deeply about.

[forsaken_queen]

I rule over the Undercity of Lordaeron. It sits below the former castle that now lies in ruins. Exposed sewers flow throughout the city, glowing green with toxins. It is filled with the undead Forsaken. Rotting, monstrous people, bound to life within dessicating, ruined bodies.

Does that suit your need, neore. [She's openly sneering.]

[deadly_ned]

It does. I met a man who lived in a sewer once, too.


I...guess being undead, you don't really have that sense of smell anymore.

Although all that toxic glowing water can't be good for your skin.

[forsaken_queen]

What an incredibly pointless observation to make.

[deadly_ned]

Do you like your home? Is grimy...sewer life a part of who you are?

[forsaken_queen]

It is what it must be.

[deadly_ned]

And you never tried to make it just a little better from what it must be?

[forsaken_queen]

There would be no point.

[deadly_ned]

Yes there is. If it would make you feel a bit more comfortable, that's the point right there.

[forsaken_queen]

Comfortable? There is no making us more comfortable. We are cursed abominations. There is nothing that can make it better.